Taxes and High Finance

The next time you hear a politician use the word "billion" in a casual manner, think about whether you want the "politicians" spending YOUR tax money.

"Billion" is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases.

A. A billion seconds ago it was 1959.
B. A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.
C. A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.
D. A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.
E. A billion dollars ago was only 8 hours and 20 minutes, at the rate our government is spending it.

While this thought is still fresh in our brain, let's take a look at New Orleans.  It's amazing what you can learn with some simple division.

Louisiana Senator, Mary Landrieu (D), is presently asking the Congress for $250 BILLION to rebuild New Orleans.  Interesting number, what does it mean?

A. Well, if you are one of 484,674 residents of New Orleans (every man, woman, child), you each get $516,528.
B. Or, if you have one of the 188,251 homes in New Orleans, your home gets $1,329,787.
C. Or, if you are a family of four, your family gets $2,066,012.

Washington, D.C. ... HELLO!!! ... Are all your calculators broken??


A Tax Poem

Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.

Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.

Tax his work,
Tax his pay,
He works for peanuts
Anyway!

Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.

Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.

Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he
Tries to think.

Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers.
If he cries
Tax his tears.

Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Tax his notes,
Tax his cash.

Tax all he has
Then let him know
We won't be done
Till he has no dough.

If he hollers,
Tax him more,
Tax him till
He's good and sore.

Tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in
Which he's laid.

Put these words
upon his tomb,
"Taxes drove me
to my doom..."

When he's gone,
Do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax.


Do you recognize these taxes?
  • Accounts Receivable Tax
  • Building Permit Tax
  • California Redemption Tax
  • CDL license Tax
  • Cigarette Tax
  • Corporate Income Tax
  • Dog License Tax
  • Excise Taxes
  • Federal Income Tax
  • Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
  • Fishing License Tax
  • Food Tax (Most states)
  • Food License Tax
  • Fuel Permit Tax
  • Gasoline Tax
  • Gross Receipts Tax
  • Hunting License Tax
  • Inheritance Tax
  • Inventory Tax
  • IRS Interest Charges
  • IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
  • Liquor Tax
  • Luxury Taxes
  • Marriage License Tax
  • Medicare Tax
  • Personal Property Tax
  • Property Tax
  • Real Estate Tax
  • Recreational Vehicle Tax
  • Recycling Tax
  • Road Usage Tax (Truckers)
  • Sales Tax
  • Service Charge Tax
  • School Tax
  • Social Security Tax
  • State Income Tax
  • State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
  • Telephone Federal Excise Tax
  • Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
  • Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes
  • Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
  • Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax
  • Telephone State and Local Tax
  • Telephone Usage Charge Tax
  • Utility Taxes
  • Vehicle License Registration Tax
  • Vehicle Sales Tax
  • Watercraft Registration Tax
  • Well Permit Tax
  • Workers Compensation Tax

STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.  We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom could stay home to raise the kids.

What happened?  Can you spell 'Politicians!'

And I still have to "press 1" for English.

I hope this goes around THE USA at least 100 times