Know the Topic, Stay on Topic. No Bunny Trails. One topic at a time till resolved.

Keep voice at normal tone, so as not to offend by raising voice

Ask questions regarding how the other person sees the situation

Use "I feel", "I was offended", "This is how I saw it", not "YOU ….."

If either party needs a Break, agreed on a time to resume, so a resolution can be reached. Like any bank teller, make sure books are balanced each evening.

Be considerate in the time one holds the floor - Take turns communicating. If necessary, use a "talking stick", or something symbolic of who has the floor.

Remember, that failing to confront issues that are really bothering you, will kill the intensity for love, even if one is successful at not showing one's intensity of frustration or anger. It still kills the vitality of one's relationship.

Find out what each other's :
1. Goals are: short term, long term / tangible, intangible
2. Priorities are:

A. Spiritually
B. Personally
C. Martially
D. Children
E. Financially
F. Health & Fitness
G. Home (Maintenance, repair, yard, car, etc)
H. Business
I. Friends
J. Influences Input: TV, Computer, Radio, Friends, Church, School etc.
K. Free time -- How to spend it